Ten years ago my life was forever changed, death has a way of doing that. My mother died after an extended illness and less than one month later my husband died following a tragic accident. I’m sure as you read this you are wondering how you will survive the terrible heartache of your loss.
The loss of my mother was so heartbreaking I was not prepared to say goodby and I miss her everyday wishing for more time as there was so much more I wanted to share and learn from her. My husband was my rock and held me up during those days following Mom’s funeral and so willingly listened while I recalled story after story and shed tear after tear.
Less than 30 days later when he died following a tragic accident – I did not know how I would live life without him. Not only was he my life partner, he was also my business partner. I had to find a way to keep my personal life and business together and I did with the help of caring friends and family.
You need help
I learned fairly early on that I couldn’t go this trip alone. I typically was a strong, independent woman that was up for most challenges in life but this was bigger than me and if I were to survive the pain than I needed to be vulnerable and ask for help. What I know for certain now is that people want to help, they often don’t know how so by asking we are allowing other to give us a gift.
Time really does heal
Regardless of how cliche is sounds, time does heal and there is life on the other side of grief.
I celebrate more than I shed tears and I have learned to live life without the physical presence of those I loved so dearly. Healing is not forgetting and living life is not ignoring our past. I truly believe the greatest way to honor our loved ones who have died is by continuing to live life!
We all have a choice
We all get to decide how we will live life. We get to decide if we want to be bitter or better. We get to decide to find joy and contentment and we get to decide what’s next in this journey called life. I decided to live life fully, to be compassionate and lend a hand to others who are grieving. I decided to move and start again, I decided to be a better listener, to stop and be in nature every day to make new friends and treasure time with old friends. I decided to spend quality time with family, I decided to make new friends. Each day I get to decide how to live, and when you think of it that way isn’t that a gift?
So what’s waiting for you on the otherside of grief? You may not be ready to look just yet, but just know that in time there are many experiences just waiting for you!
I am inspired by the poem “The Summer Day” by Mary Oliver. I hope you will read the entire poem and then share with me in the comments below, “what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”
with love, JoAnne Funch